I was emptying kitchen slops into the open gutter when I heard the “schop schop” sound of water forcing itself out of a faucet. I screamed ‘first!’ Azeez screamed ‘first’ a second later.
“I said first, first.”
“So? Wetin you go do?” Azeez retorted, squaring up to me.
“But na me first talk first, wetin dey worry you?” His hand exploded on my face. Tawai! I was momentarily confused for a second but my “nigerianness” kicked in and I slapped him back because that was the right thing to do. Everyone knows you should always slap back. That’s the code.

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